I hate seeing people get hurt. I hate getting hurt. Out of all honesty, Michael is my first boyfriend. Yes, I have been in love before... but not the love I have for him. See, I used to talk and hang with this kid named Charlie for awhile. And he was my best guy friend. I never actually dated him, but we always said we loved each other. We acted like we dated even... but It never happened. Never once had a kiss, never once held hands. If it was a kiss it was on the cheek because we didn't want to date anyone so when people asked us out we pretended to date each other. In that time, I actually fell in love, he fell in love but he had to move. He moved to PA. Before he moved we both did something we thought could be right and ended out not to be, because we weren't ready and didn't feel comfortable after. We had sex. After we did that, we both felt like it was wrong, like we shouldn't have. So we made a truce and said that if we both thought that it was wrong it didn't count. Clearly, I never had sex until Michael came around. In my mind, but a couple months into it I told him I have had sex before and he wasn't the first. He doesn't know the whole story about it. The past month I told him he is my first boyfriend. He seemed shocked. Maybe I shouldn't have told him, I don't know. I'm glad a did. When I look at Michael, I don't see what others do. I see a charming, sweet, funny, intelligent person. I see someone I can be with for the rest of my life, if that happens. I see someone who isn't afraid to tell me what they're thinking, who isn't a complete angel. I'm so glad that he does mess up, I'm glad that he accepts me for who I am. I can say that I have someone who truly cares for me, and wants to marry me someday. I can I feel the same. It's our 9th month day, and we're still rollin'.
What I mean by "I hate when people get hurt, and I hate that I get hurt." Is that... We're all victims of this thing called love. Some people just can't handle it, either. Some don't believe in love because they're scared they'll get hurt. It's understandable, but you do have to rake risks in life. Now, I'm going to talk about a friend of mine who is probably scared to love again because she's been hurt so much, and it's only been one guy who's hurt her. Her name is Cheyenne, and I can honestly say this guy has probably destroyed her. I never once liked him, and for all I care he could rot in hell for the things he's done. He's cheated, he's lied, he went out with one of her closest friends... That's not what guys are suppose to do. He's starting to spread rumors about her in summer school so next year she'll get made fun of for it. I won't let that happen. She's one of my closest friends and she deserves to be happy. She really does, and I hope I'm there to see her grow strong.
My best friend, in the whole entire world, her name is Alyssa. And she's terrified to fall in love. She believes in it, and believes it will happen but she gets so crushed over the littlest things. I'm always there when she can't sleep, and she calls me, I'm there for when she cries, about things that happen in her life. I'm always there. She just believes that no one will love her. That girl has so much love to give, I don't think anyone would ever been good enough for it. I just wish she'd realize that. Me? I used to getting hurt, but yes. I do have people who help me get through it. And that's mainly Alyssa And Cheyenne.
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